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Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Blair "has not volunteered for Mars mission"
 Our sources say that Mr ACL Blair has not yet put his name forward as a candidate for the 2023 expedition to establish a colony on Mars, though it could have certain advantages for him.

He would be safe there from attempts by members of the public to perform a citizen's arrest. Nor could he be called back to explain what he meant when advising Mrs Rebekah Brooks to establish a "Hutton style" enquiry that would "clear" her.

However, some say that Mrs Blair might be tempted to nominate him for the one-way trip, should further embarrassing evidence come to light suggesting a romantic link between him and the wife of Rupert Murdoch.

Although Mr Blair would then be aged 70, Mars One sets no upper age restriction. More important are qualities of intellect and character. We are confident that he would qualify in most, if not all respects - "The astronauts must be intelligent, creative, psychologically stable and physically healthy" - and the jaunt would certainly satisfy his well-known delight in travel.

The full astronaut specification can be seen here:

Readers may care to suggest others who might be similarly suited to go, or whom it would suit us to send.


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A K Haart said...

Are you sure about this? We don't want dire warning about the Martians having weapons of mass destruction.

Sackerson said...

Did you mean "weapons of Mars destruction"?

Paddington said...

It should work. He and his wife are what Americans call 'Space Cadets'.